


Waiting for the takeoff

by myoue



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Airplanes, Airports, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cuddling & Snuggling, Friendship, M/M, Phobias, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-06-12
Packaged: 2018-04-03 09:35:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4096003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myoue/pseuds/myoue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flying is scary, Eren thinks. But Levi has always been right there beside him and makes him feel like he's been flying all this time anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **Warning:** a bit of airplane/flying phobia

The takeoff part isn’t so bad, Eren thinks to himself. It’s smooth, gradual, like they’re gliding into the air as naturally as a very heavy solid manmade object possibly could.

At least, that’s what Eren thinks when he presses his nose to the glass of the inside of the airport and watches the flight from Gate 37 traverse the runway and takeoff into the sky. He’d been doing this for the last forty minutes or so and refocuses his gaze to another airplane that seems to be coming out of Gate 42…

“Eren,” Levi calls from behind him, and Eren turns to see him sitting on an airport chair like a normal person, crossed legs and tapping methodically on the laptop he has on his lap. “Get your ass and your luggage over here or you won’t get a seat. You’re just lucky we got here three hours before our flight.”

“Yeah, but airplanes are quite beautiful, aren’t they?” Eren says distractedly, jabbing his finger to the glass at the airplane of Gate 42 turning around a bend on the runway.

“Are they? I’ve only heard you say that about fifty times today,” Levi surmises.

“I see them go by all the time on my way to school. My campus is right by the airport, you know. They get so close, like they’re flying right over your head. It’s a bit scary.”

“I know,” Levi replies absentmindedly because he has no time for Eren’s random jabber. He takes out his wallet to sift through the familiar bills among the foreign ones. “I’m going to get us some food. Do you want to come with or do you want to stay and save our seats?”

“I want to come!”

“Never mind. You’re staying here because that vulture couple over there looks like they’re getting ready to pounce on our seats.” Levi gets up, pocketing his wallet, and Eren pouts.

“They do not.” Eren side-eyes them.

“They do, too.”

Levi walks away, saying something about burgers and fries, and Eren drags himself over to Levi’s seat surrounded by piles of luggage on either side. He places Levi’s laptop case on top of his lap and sinks into the seat, thinking about how they’re hogging up four seats with all of their stuff being up off the floor when really they could have made do with just hogging two seats for the both of them. No wonder the couple over there is so pissed. But explaining this to Levi would just get him another rant about how airports have diseases from all over the world and their luggage should be up and off of the disease-ridden floor. Eren couldn’t argue with that.

He would think that Levi would be used to it by now, having been on a plane more times than Eren can count. Levi is very well-travelled and Eren, well, had never been out of the country. There was more than one opportunity to, don’t get him wrong, like during his high school’s graduation trip to that place somewhere in South America or to Germany for his language course in second year.

But it had just never worked out. He’d found an excuse one way or the other.

“I’m visiting my family in France this summer. Do you want to come with me?” Levi had then asked him one day, as casually as one could be when inviting someone to meet the family.

Eren had almost choked on the cereal he was eating that morning.

He would have to pay for the plane tickets himself, but the lodgings would be with Levi’s family, and really that was the only reason why Eren had accepted. That and the fact that communicating with Levi just by instant message for a whole month hadn’t seemed appealing at all.

He’s known Levi for years and not once had he ever gone back to visit the family. Eren almost can’t believe that the one time Levi does decide to go back, that he’ll be bringing back a guy. His family will probably misunderstand, if anything.

Apparently, Levi, too, has no idea what the implications of all this really means. Eren sighs in his seat, stretching his legs out in front of him.

Twenty minutes later, Levi comes back with two bags from the nearest fast food place and a begrudging look on his face.

“That line was atrocious,” he mutters, shifting the bags to one arm so he can move the luggage on the seat, and Eren hurriedly takes the bags from him.

“What about the prices?” Eren asks, looking curiously into what Levi’s bought.

“Even more disgusting.”

He laughs and hands Levi back a bag once he sits down with a gruff sigh. The double cheeseburger that Levi always gets will cheer him up. He likes to eat it with the wrapper still on so he doesn’t get his hands dirty. But even then, Levi will still use a napkin in between bites and get up to wash his hands once he’s done.

“What have you been looking up?” Levi gazes at the screen of his laptop that Eren’s got sat open on his legs. “Aviation safety…” Levi enunciates slowly, reading the top tab. He looks like he’s about to lecture Eren on why he shouldn’t be looking up things that will only make him more paranoid.

“Did you know that people are more likely to die from a car accident than from a plane crash?” Eren blurts anyway.

Levi bites into his burger ravenously. “Everybody knows that.”

“So, why are people still afraid of airplanes?” Eren goes on, playing with the zipper of Levi’s laptop case instead of eating his own burger. “It makes no sense, really. They’ll condemn airplanes but then step right into their death machine of a car. And I’ve figured it out, Levi,  _I’ve figured it out_. It’s because all you see on TV and in the newspapers are horrific plane crashes. They explode and kill everyone onboard and it’s so tragic, and sometimes they never even know why or how it happened. Sometimes they never even find your body. You’re just lost out in the ocean somewhere. Probably in pieces along with the plane wreckage—”

“Eren,” Levi says exasperatedly, putting down his half-eaten burger.

“Sorry, I just…” Eren can feel his heart racing already as he watches the plane from Gate number whatever getting ready to rev up along the runway. He shouldn’t even be here. He doesn’t remember why he’s here. The only reason why he hasn’t called for a taxi home already is because…

“I asked you to be here,” Levi says flatly, practically reading Eren’s mind.

His hand pries Eren’s off of the laptop case’s zipper before he can tear it right off, and for a brief moment Eren is completely distracted by Levi’s hand on his. Levi doesn’t seem to notice.

“It’s going to be fine. I’m right here. You’re right here,” Levi says, trying his best to be reassuring, and Eren breathes it in. “And we’ll both make it there in one piece, alright? If you want, you can sleep on my shoulder the whole time. It’ll be comfy. Now, can you eat your damn burger? Because I paid three times more for it than I should have and I know you’re not going to like the plane food.”

Eren can’t help but relax at that, even when Levi’s hand releases his in order to finish his own meal. He always knows just what to say, and Eren can’t deny to himself the only reason why he hasn’t called a taxi home yet is because Levi is here with him.

Eren closes the laptop and takes out the chicken burger Levi got him. “You better not go back on your word, about letting me sleep on your shoulder,” Eren teases.

“’Course not,” Levi answers. “What are friends for?”

That word hits a little bit harder than it should have as Eren slowly unwraps his burger, smiling sadly at it in his hands, and knowing that Levi has no idea Eren is taking advantage of his niceness.

-

Levi offers Eren the choice between both the window seat and the aisle seat, and Eren takes pretty much all of the time pre-flight switching back and forth.

“What if I get nauseous looking out the window?” Eren wonders, staring out the small window at the very clear and very close ground. It won’t be like that for long. “But the aisle seat means I can get up to go to the bathroom in case I do get nauseous…”

Levi huffs impatiently. “Maybe you’re better off in the aisle seat, then. You can still see out the window from there if you squint your eyes and lean over.”

Eren blinks. That does sound like a nice compromise. “Okay, I’ve decided. Aisle seat it is.”

He listens intently to the flight safety procedures that the attendants go through, even though Levi tells him that they don’t really have to listen.

“It’s necessary!” Eren spouts back, playing with the light and air buttons above them, and Levi rolls his eyes. Eren ignores him. “How else would you know to use the seat cushion as a flotation device in the event of a water landing?”

“Eren, I’ve been on an airplane so many goddamn times. I could recite the whole handout to you.”

If anything, Eren just needs a distraction. “Prove it,” he challenges.

And Levi does. With astonishing professionalism.

He locates the nearest plane exits before the stewardess does, explains the drop down oxygen masks with a worrying amount of detail (Eren had to make sure Levi never seriously used it before), and while Eren is just trying to keep up, all he can do is be fascinated with Levi’s vast knowledge of airplane safety. He just can’t help but watch as Levi goes on with varying amounts of enthusiasm and hand motions despite looking like he’s becoming annoyed even at himself for knowing this much.

“Thanks,” Eren says, smiling softly to himself when Levi finishes. “I feel safer already.” And he really means that.

Levi makes an amused sound. “You’re probably the only person ever to feel safer after listening to different accident procedures.”

“Well, when you put it that way…”

It’s mostly due to the fact that Levi will do just about anything that Eren asks him to, and it does a number on his heart, makes him feel a bit giddy and privileged, far more so than any of the people flying first class.

“Woah!” Eren immediately grabs Levi’s wrist beside him without thinking and stares straight ahead, feeling the whole plane rumbling. “Are we moving? Are we flying?”

Levi twists his arm so he can rub a thumb into Eren’s palm. “We’re not flying yet. Just moving to the runway.”

“Oh.”

He can’t bring himself to move. Levi has a hand on his, they’re almost holding hands. Eren wants to wretch himself out of it because it’s making him more anxious than the actual airplane, but there’s something that always stops him.

It’s just feels too nice.

“Just pretend we’re on the subway or something,” Levi tells him, rubbing soothing circles into his palm that don’t do anything to calm him down. “Close your eyes.”

Eren does.

But he can’t seem to focus on anything except for Levi touching him. He feels guilty.

It’s not like this has never happened before, though. Like there was that one time when they were both reaching for the steak sauce at the same time when they were eating out at some dingy family restaurant. There was also that other time when Eren had thrown up at an amusement park after riding a terribly steep roller coaster and Levi had patted his back all the way through it. Eren could tell Levi wanted to stay fifty metres away from him at that point, but he’d stayed with Eren the whole time.

And maybe Eren is simple, taking enjoyment out of every little thing, and falling for Levi over things that aren’t worth falling over. But he just can’t help it. He’s gotten addicted to the way Levi makes him feel over the littlest things and there’s no way Eren can properly explain it. Not even if he wanted to.

Eren’s not sure if him going on this trip is supposed to make Levi realize anything. It’s not. Eren had wanted to go because he didn’t want Levi to go all by himself. And maybe he also couldn’t say no to him, either.

Eren opens his eyes when his body suddenly feels weightless, and he turns to the window to see the ground almost diagonal.

“Levi, we’re flying!” he yells excitedly over the noise of the airplane. “Oh, it’s so cool…”

“What happened to closing your eyes?” Levi calls back. He’s got his own eyes closed, like he was sleeping before Eren decided to yell right at his face.

The ground descends beneath them, and they get higher and higher until the cars and the buildings look miniature.

Eren doesn’t realize how far he’s leaning over and how hard he’s gripping Levi’s hand until he feels fingers lace through his. It makes his heart stutter briefly, to the point that he almost misses what Levi has to say next.

“When are you going to tell me?”

But Eren is confused at that, thinks he might have misheard because the noise from the airplane is still so loud and deafening and Levi had said it so quietly. Eren’s not quite sure what Levi’s referring to.

“What?”

But when he looks towards Levi, Eren sees him staring out the window with an unreadable expression now that they’re heading above the clouds.

“You look like you’d be better off in the window seat after all,” Levi says instead, still not letting go of the hold he has on Eren’s hand. “We can switch seats once the seatbelt sign turns off and the plane goes into cruising mode.”

Eren is sure that’s not what Levi meant to say before, but he figures he can always ask about it later when it’s not so loud and they’re safe on ground-level again.

For now, Eren says, “Sure” and lays his head on Levi’s shoulder. But he doesn’t close his eyes. He stares at their hands intertwined together.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: i changed the title because eh i had it as 'takeoff' in my word docs so my mind just got used to it
> 
> i hope i'm not a jackass for this lol

Levi first met Eren at the airport for his 8:10 AM flight to Germany.

One of the nervous types, Levi had surmised when he saw the kid staring out the glass windows and incessantly tapping his foot against the tiled floor.

“You also in GER205?” Eren had asked him, seeing as they were standing in a group of other students waiting for their boarding passes from the group leader. Levi had thought the kid was starting up a conversation out of nerves.

He nodded. “Though, I would honestly rather go on my own.” Levi scoffed to himself, looking at Eren up and down. “I don’t see the need to have to fly with the rest of the class. We’re going to look like a bunch of tourists.”

Eren merely chuckled, light and airily. “You don’t like looking like a tourist? Wouldn’t people be extra nice to you then?”

“Not at all,” Levi replied sullenly, sipping at the shitty airport coffee he unpleasantly subjected himself to. “I don’t like being looked down upon and tourists are seen as easy. People are more likely to stalk you and try to sell you stuff like cheap umbrellas and fake watches. It’s disgusting.”

Eren’s reaction was first a look of instinctive worry, probably imagining what Levi could have possibly gone through to know all that, and he’s probably not too far off.

“You travel a lot?” Eren had come to the conclusion of. His expression had slowly changed to one of intrigue, standing somewhat closer now and eyes glossing over.

“I guess so.” Levi shrugged. “You?”

Eren smiled a little. “This would have been my first time on an airplane.”

“Would have?”

Just then another boy had come by, carrying two cups of coffee and a takeout bag shoved into his palm. “Hey, here’s your coffee,” he said to Eren, offering him a cup before sitting at the seat next to him.

“Thanks, Armin.”

Levi raised an eyebrow, and only now noticed just the one set of luggage in front of who he’d been talking to and assumed belonged to.

Probably seeing Levi’s confused face, Eren opted to explain, “I’m not going on the trip. Afraid of flying, you know? I was just watching his stuff.” He nodded towards his friend on the other side. “And seeing him off.”

“Oh.” Levi watched the other boy dig into his wrap, eyeing the two of them while chewing. “How nice of you. It’s a bit early, isn’t it?” Levi said.

It was Eren’s turn to shrug, wrapping his fingers around the warmth of the coffee in his hands. “It is. But I told him I’d drive him here, and I guess I also wanted to see what the airport was like. Reminds me of a train station.”

“Hm.” Levi hummed distractedly. He’d never thought of it like that before. To him, airports were day-long trips, incredibly time-wasting and energy-consuming, and losing track of the outside world was an added perk.

“By the way, I’m Eren,” Eren said. He looked like he almost wanted to reach out his hand to shake but decided against it. “I’m also in this class. I’m a bit sad now that I decided not to go on this trip, though…”

“I’m Levi. Guess your friend will tell you what you missed.”

His friend gave a grin and a nod through his wrap.

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Eren replied, looking over when the group leader whistled for all of them to gather to get their tickets. “I hope you guys have fun.”

Levi grabbed his stuff, slinging his carry-on onto his shoulder and dragging his suitcase behind him as he started walking away. “Hope you’ll get over your plane phobia by the next Germany trip,” he called back.

Eren curled part of his lip.

“I’ll definitely go on it next time!” he’d promised. And for some reason he seemed to really mean that despite what Levi would come to know later as a somewhat annoying and debilitating case of plane phobia that would prevent Eren from going on a plane for the next four years.

The way Eren’s eyes trained on him in the airport, sparkling, it made Levi think that despite the phobia and everything, this kid had more drive to see the world than him.

When Levi was on the plane to Germany not long after, for the first time he tried to really look out the small passenger window, down at the tiny cars moving below. He’d just met the guy and yet he caught himself wondering which car could be Eren’s driving around in this small city.

-

There isn’t any particular reason why Levi invited Eren to meet his family halfway across the world.

He had left his home of 18 straight years when he went off to university and ironically spent a lot of his time not there; doing co-op in a number of different cities and study abroads in an even larger number of different countries.

Doing that wasn’t a thing he had planned either, but he’d gotten caught up in all of the flyers and the corkboard signs and the weekly student fairs he’d passed by on the way to classes, urging him to consider new once-in-a-lifetime experiences.

So, Levi had taken off for more once-in-a-lifetime experiences than he could easily count, using student loans and the small budget he’d accrued from working co-op positions. He didn't have a particular favourite, but thinking back, it was often the time spent in the airports that stuck out in his mind rather than the actual countries.

Eren had always been looking for a way out, even if just temporarily. That’s what Levi could remember thinking.

“Your family is really nice,” Eren whispers to him at midnight when they’re just getting ready for bed. “Granted, I can’t really understand them but they seem like really nice people.”

“They are,” Levi agrees, pulling on a baggy night shirt, and if he didn’t know any better he would think Eren had been staring the whole time. “They love you, just so you know,” Levi adds.

“Ah, they do?” Eren seems to run his hand nervously through his hair. “That’s… good.”

“Mmhm.”

Eren sits on the bed, bringing the quilted covers back and laying them over his legs. He’s got cute plaid pajama bottoms on and a plain old band t-shirt that Levi recognizes from a concert they’d attended together. Eren had once said that the reason why he had first approached Levi at the airport for the Germany trip was because Levi had been wearing a familiar band t-shirt as well. Or something like that.

“They were really excited to meet you,” Levi says.

 _Because I’ve told them all about you_. That’s what he wants to tell Eren.

His family had wanted to know everything about everything that’s changed with Levi, how he’s been living these past few years by himself, how he’s been getting on, and Levi couldn’t think of any way to even begin explaining it all without Eren being somewhere in there. He’d just managed to show up in every instance Levi had when talking about what he’d last ate or what he did last Friday night or how unfair this one professor was because Eren had a million and one stories about everything.

“I’m really glad you invited me.” Eren sighs, flopping back onto the bed. He looks around at Levi’s old room, the white walls bare and the space somewhat empty with not being lived in for quite a while.

“I wanted to,” Levi replies casually.

“To be in France, to see where you grew up, where you ate and slept and…” Eren trails off like he just realizes where he’s sitting right now. “Yeah,” he finishes lamely.

He’s got his arms thrown up and over his face, probably trying to look like he’s tired but all Levi can think is that Eren’s trying to hide the colour of his cheeks while being completely unaware that it’s causing his old baggy band shirt to ride up and over his hipbones.

Levi is so used to it that he's long since been able to forgive himself unapologetically for not being able to tear his eyes away.

“You still have that shirt?” Levi blurts by the time he’s snapped out of his stupor of staring and hopes Eren will be decent again and pull his goddamn shirt down.

“Huh?” Eren sits up now, thankfully, and peers down at himself. He takes a few moments to stretch out the fabric so he can take a better look at it. “Hmm, it’s only—what? Three years old? You said it looked good on me so…”

“No, I said you look good in black.”

Levi blurts that by accident, too.

“Oh.” Eren puts his head down, blushes, but it seems he’s aware of this, at least.

It doesn’t take much to get Eren all fluffed up like this, and if anything were to ever progress beyond this point it would probably be one of the things Levi would sorely miss. Being able to affect Eren like this, to see the effect it has in his eyes and his lips and the twisting of his fingers as Eren tries to shake it off what seems like, what's supposed to be like, an innocent comment, but simply can’t.

But then again, Levi would give it all up in a heartbeat if it meant Eren would look at him differently; with passionate love instead of longing, with confidence instead of turning away, and to truly smile like he’s going all out instead of holding it back because he feels like it's undeserving.

With every fibre of his being, Levi wants to touch more than Eren’s hand. He wants to say more than _It looks good on you_ … and instead _You are good, You are perfect, You are everything_ …

“I guess we should get to bed,” Eren says, snapping Levi out of his thoughts.

“Right.”

For now, Levi can only go to turn off the light while Eren settles into the bed, facing Levi who slips into the spare mattress and blanket on the floor as the room darkens so they can just barely see each other.

“Thanks again for letting me have the bed,” Eren murmurs, and Levi can hear him getting comfortable in the blankets. His blankets.

“It’s fine,” Levi answers. “I don’t want to disturb you if I can’t fall asleep.”

“You can always wake me up if you can’t fall asleep,” Eren offers, as he does every time. “We can talk about stuff until you feel sleepy again.”

Levi considers that. He also considers telling Eren that the past few times they’d shared a room for the night together Levi had found peace just by watching Eren sleep. Just his breathing and his serene face.

But Levi doesn’t mention any of this. “Maybe,” he says instead, even though he has no intention of bothering Eren in the middle of the night.

“G’night, then,” Eren breathes, sounding slightly closer, like he’s right at the edge of the bed saying it to Levi.

“Night,” Levi says back.

Silence falls between them, and Levi sinks into the pillow and the mattress. He can tell by Eren’s even breathing that he’s fallen asleep already.

It’s about an hour of listening to Eren breathe and hearing a couple of people from his family get up to go to the washroom before Levi is getting tired of not sleeping. Lying flat on his back and staring up into the darkness, he thinks about taking Eren up on that offer to talk about random things.

They’d done it before, too, and Eren had actually stayed up with him. They’d ended up talking all night long about things that Levi can't even remember, not getting a wink of sleep, before they could see the sun rising from behind the curtains and deciding to go get coffee and breakfast together.

“Eren,” Levi whispers into the silence, but he gets no response. Doesn’t even get a snore or a shuffle in the blankets.

A few moments pass and Levi decides to get up from the mattress, pushing the blankets off himself.

“Eren,” he whispers again more harshly, and Eren gives a tired groan in response this time.

Through the darkness of the room, Levi’s eyes have adjusted to the point where he can see Eren spread out flat on his stomach in the middle of the bed.

And it’s at that point that Levi lifts up part of the covers and slides himself into the bed as quietly and elegantly as possible. Whatever he said about not disturbing Eren be damned.

Because. Mm. It’s warm.

But not uncomfortably so, despite being summer.

Eren stirs, stretching out his arm until his hand nudges against the top of Levi’s head, feels around the softness of Levi’s hair, and only then is the sensation deemed strange enough for Eren to crack open an eye to see what the hell is going on.

“Levi!?” he squeaks, coming to his senses and shrinking instinctively until his body is no longer taking up the majority of the bed. “What—?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Levi sulks.

“You couldn’t just wake me up? Did you… have to crawl into the bed? While I was sleeping…”

“I hate the mattress on the floor. I can’t stand it. It sucks.”

Eren sighs, and Levi can practically feel the warmth of his breath up close and personal. “We can switch if you want—”

“No.”

Eren is fully awake now, seeming stiff as a board and trying to back up in the bed as far as possible before he would fall right off it and onto the floor. But the bed isn’t all that big and Levi isn’t giving him all that much room to work with. They’re so close that Levi could easily reach out and…

“Wha—What are you doing!?”

“Turning on the lamp,” Levi replies calmly, physically reaching out his arm along with half of his body to lean over Eren, in order to feel around for the switch on the night stand next to the bed. Unfortunately, Levi doesn’t have a lamp on his side. Meanwhile, Eren starts going into hysterics.

“You can just—! Go around, though! Why… like this…” he pleads. His hands are up, pressed desperately against Levi’s abdomen as he tries not to be smothered and tries not to have his face shoved helplessly into Levi’s neck.

“I don’t want to get up. This is easier,” Levi claims, grasping at nothing in the dark.

“Is it!?”

Granted, remembering where the switch for the lamp is after years is proving more difficult than Levi originally thought. “I can’t find it,” he admits truthfully but not at all regretfully.

He ends up giving up, flopping himself lazily on top of Eren, and not moving anymore. He can feel Eren’s heartbeat going crazy.

“I’m tired,” Levi finally mutters in hopes Eren just thinks he’s sleep-addled, but it’s an excuse. The rapid rising and falling of Eren’s chest feels like a roller coaster beneath him, and Levi sort of just wants to lay here comfortably like this.

“Um!” Eren’s voice is pitched, hands awkwardly at his sides and not knowing what to do with them. He ends up muffling through Levi’s hair, “Are… you okay?”

Levi almost laughs. He wants to ask Eren the same thing.

“Yeah,” he says quietly.

But Eren doesn’t move to push him off or anything. Eventually, his chest and his breathing slows to a normal rate. He lets Levi hold him, lets Levi snake his legs around his beneath the covers, and Levi will whisper potential _I love you_ s under his breath the whole night.


End file.
